Instructions to Wives & Husbands
December 4, 2022
Commentary
It is easy to appear Spirit-filled at church, but it takes a true work of the Holy Spirit to show godliness daily in the home and family relationships. Paul explains this with the wife (vv. 22–24) and the husband (vv. 25–32). Wives are to submit to their husbands as to the Lord (v. 22; COL 3:18). The reason is that God gave the husband the responsibility of loving leadership in the home (v. 23). Real spiritual leadership means humble service, not control or pride. A wise, Christ-honoring husband will not take advantage of his position but will lead with love, gentleness, and care.
Submission does not mean inferiority. It means the wife recognizes her husband’s role as head of the home and supports him. Her example is Christ’s headship over the Church (v. 23). Just as the Church submits to Christ, the wife should support her husband’s leadership so he can fulfill his role before God. Wives should respect and encourage their husbands, just as the Church honors Christ (v. 24).
Husbands are to love (COL 3:19). Many wives struggle to submit because their husbands fail to show loving leadership, especially in spiritual matters. The Spirit of God uses the Word of God to guide a husband daily. To be filled with the Spirit produces in him a sacrificial love (v. 25), a sanctifying love (vv. 26–27), and a satisfying love (vv. 28–30). Husbands are to love their wives “just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her.” True love provides, protects, and cares spiritually and emotionally. “A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife” (v. 31). Paul concludes, “Each one must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband” (v. 33).
Application
Do I show Christ’s love and respect in my closest relationships? Today I want to let the Holy Spirit guide how I speak, serve, and lead. How will I use my role at home to build unity and trust? Today, with whom will I love humbly, forgive quickly, and follow God’s design so my home honors Christ?
Ephesians 5:22–33 (NET)
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church (he himself being the savior of the body). 24 But as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to sanctify her by cleansing her with the washing of the water by the word, 27 so that he may present the church to himself as glorious—not having a stain or wrinkle, or any such blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one has ever hated his own body, but he feeds it and takes care of it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and will be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. 32 This mystery is great—but I am actually speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless, each one of you must also love his own wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Value Of a Wife’s Services
Bob Greene (in the Detroit Free Press) cited a study by attorney Michael Minton on the monetary value of a wife’s services in the home. First he listed the various functions she performs: chauffeur, gardener, family counselor, maintenance wo … Continue