The Growth of a Couples Marriage

Commentary

This section of the Song of Solomon deals with the growth of the couple’s marriage. This does not mean, however, that they did not encounter any problems in their relationship. A little while after their marriage, the problem of indifference crept in. This problem is introduced by her dream (vv. 2-7).

In her dream, she had gotten ready for bed, but somehow had grown cold toward her husband’s advances and locked the bedroom door. He tried to open the door but failed and left. Then her compassion was aroused for him (v. 4), but when she opened the door, he was gone (v. 6). Instead, she found perfume on the door handle as a token of affection for his beloved (v. 5). Then she set out to look for him and asked the daughters of Jerusalem to help her (v. 8). They wanted to know what was so special about her lover that they should help look for him (v. 9). This question caused her to praise her husband which helped rekindle her former feelings of love (vv. 10-16).

With the passing of time and the growth of familiarity, a marriage can start to lose its sparkle. Glances and touches no longer produce the same emotional response. If this should happen, you should remember those fist thrills and excitement in the time you spent with your spouse and the commitment you made. Just as in the example given here, when you focus on the positives, reconciliation and renewal can result. Too often people are driven into marriage by feelings and passions rather than taking time to develop a deep friendship. This involves listening, sharing, and showing understanding for the other person’s likes and dislikes.

Application

I must continually look for ways to keep the sparkle in my marriage.